The Reluctant Hero [entries|friends|calendar] Squall Leonheart [ userinfo | livejournal userinfo ] [ calendar | livejournal calendar ]

watching her [20 Mar 2005|06:44pm] im back in my room, bleeding a bit. that sora is strong i think he has someone he wants to protect to.... im sitting here watching rinoa i cant tell if she is a sleep, or awake. im going to go lie down next to her and hold her for the few hours i have left till sunrise .renzokuken.

Judgement and justification. [01 Mar 2005|08:10pm] How do we really justify our actions? In this world we can be called heros for killing monsters, fiends, and heartless. But is it any diffrent then murdering someone? Who places the judgement that killing monsters is alright? In the end isnt humanity the monster. i sit here on the corner of my bed glancing over at a sleeping rinoa typeing away on this little journal am i as much of a monster as a torma or a ruby dragon? I think too much... ....I proprosed to rinoa .It took me two long years to find her, a trip around the world,my life... nearly, and i couldnt be happier. The orginazation... they will come after her after us. i wont let them take her. I wont let anyone take her away from me again. When i think about all this the burn on my back starts to sting, is it some kind of omen. Maybe i worry to much... Im going for a walk. Then again who cares no one reads these damn journals anyways.... .renzokuken.

? ? ? [19 Feb 2005|03:00pm] i dont know what is going on. i cant really see anything right now but i hear plenty of voices. I dont know am i alive? am i dead? thats not really what worries me though. that blast it was huge are rinoa and the others alright? .renzokuken.

memories and the guardian forces [16 Feb 2005|04:39pm] [ mood | accomplished ] Was selphie right.. will i really loose all of my memories cause of junctioning... it was said to be just a rumor but im forgetting alot of things. Will i evcen forget her? all of them zell,rinoa,irvine,quistis,selphie,edea,head master cid, or even yuna,tidus, aeris, and cloud. will i forget every person i have ever met. on a more positive note that mage i met taught me some useful spells and with the figt happening later today (it now being 3:00 am)im might need them. I had a dream last night i was in the colusieum i saw coud talking to yuna i oculdnt hear what they were saying though dreams are weird at least i didmt dream i was a moron.... again .renzokuken.

rational thoughts. [13 Feb 2005|05:37pm] Maybe I really am getting stronger, but honestly will it be enough to beat cloud. Im honestly afraid, this time will he kill me? i wish there was some way i could see her one last time at least just to say good bye. Im not saying i will die but latley, i have had this feeling that everythings going to come to an abrupt end. I keep seeing images of her in my head locked in some cold room and i hear his laughter. I have to win against cloud. We really have alot in common cloud and I we are fighting for similar reasons. I ownder in another time under diffrent condtions could we have been allies maybe even friends. There really isnt much time im going to practice for a bit i happened to meet a black mage who is going to help me with some magic skills. .renzokuken.

a flame burning in my soul [06 Feb 2005|02:04pm] its still in my mind. after a defeat like that i never want to fell so weak again. i have been thinking about a few possibiltys but only one wroks i have to hurry and train before blondie gets back. i have entered my self in a few of the cups with out the knwoledge of my compainons, maybe this will help me beat him. ||1|| painful recollection | .renzokuken.

[06 Feb 2005|01:21pm] [ mood | guilty ] it all has gone by me in a flash these last few years.... to think that at one point i was just a kid in school with no friends all i did was care for myself. I wonder what my life would be like had i not been on that mission had i never met rinoa. things like these seem to keep me up at night like i always thought i was strong and then i met that blonde haired kid cloud i think had we met at a diffrent time in other conditons we might have been friends. It seems like im never strong enough i couldnt save rinoa when she needed me most and now that bastard seifer has her locked away somewhere and the only way i can find out how to get to him is by beating a fighter with twice my ability. we promised each other we would see each other again i told her id save her. im worthless, all i can do is hope for a miracle when cloud and i have our rematch. .renzokuken.

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